Back to School Series 1: Vocabulary
As of Labor Day, the summer is officially over. I know, I know... the calendar says we have
until later in the month, but the last hurrah of vacations and excursions and shopping for the
new school year are over, and the routine of the "ber" months kicks in.
In my area of Kentucky, school started back in August, and Labor Day is the first break from
the routine, only to pick it back up on a Tuesday, buckling in for the long haul 'til Fall Break,
then the holidays. School is IN, and I couldn't be happier.
I love this time of year. Even though my crew is long past their school years, I still love
shopping for supplies... new pens, new notebooks, new journals, calendars, and markers. It's an
obsession. Don't get me started on how many pens I have. It's a running joke among my
friends, only confirmed by my occasional pictures on Facebook of my pen caddy with its twelve
storage slots completely filled with writing instruments galore. My favorite is the EnerGel by
Pentel....and did you know? You can get refills for the pens on their site, along with a plethora
(don't you love that word?) plethora of colors from violet to fuschia to yellow to neon green
along with the usual blues, blacks, and reds. My favorite is Navy. It's a delightfully dark blue
ink that doesn't scream bloody blue like the usual blues, and it isn't so dark as black. Yes. I
know. I'm a little pen crazy. Perhaps even a snob! Navy blue ink makes me happy.
So today I'm starting a series called Back to School. We'll take a look at vocabulary, social
studies, math, science, literature, maybe. I'll see where my lesson plans lead me. :) Today, I
want to talk about vocabulary. I have eight little words to ruminate on (I like that word, too,
ruminate), to see if you use them in sentences the way I do, and to challenge you to recognize
them when they come up, particularly in your self talk.
About a year ago, in Season One, I did an episode titled, "Speak More Gently, Please." In it I
was particularly concerned with the way I and many of my friends talk to ourselves. We tend to
be hyper-critical, and we use words to ourselves that we'd never use to talk to other people. I
wrote:
How are you speaking to yourself when you are less than perfect? Does your self-talk
reflect how Jesus would speak to you? How you would speak to someone you love?
Jesus's gentleness is available to us for others and for ourselves. How humbling to think
that my words to me can be like Jesus's, and how beautiful it will be when that gentleness
overflows in kindness to others.
Our words have power. Proverbs 18:21 says, "Death and life are in the power of the
tongue." Let us speak life to others and let us speak life to ourselves. More gentleness,
less condemnation. More love, less hate. More blessings, less curses.
In our vocabulary lesson today, I want to look at eight words that are so innocuous (isn't that a
great word?), so embedded in our conversation that we don't even notice them. We don't see
how they undermine our confidence, make us feel less-than, and diminish our God-given
identity.
Curious yet? Let's get started (there might be a quiz at the end!)!
JUST.
Our first word is just. Just used as an adverb, which, if you remember from grammar lessons in
school, is a word used to modify, enhance, or clarify an adjective (describing word) or a verb
(an action word). Finally making use of those grammar lessons, right? Now if only I could find
a use for the trigonometry class I had in high school!
Just... as in I'm just a housewife, just a junior partner, just started my business, I'm just a
salesperson, just a consultant, just a mom. Isn't it interesting how we clarify, modify, enhance
when we are talking about ourselves to others? When I find myself shrinking behind a just, it
most often has to do with my lack of confidence or an inner limiting belief that comes to the
surface. I think we do it out of a false sense of humility... not that your humility is false, but that
we feel the need to speak in a more...? what? Demeaning, belittling? Limiting? Way? So we
qualify with "just."
There's a difference in humility and bragging, of course, and Scripture is clear that we
remember from Whom we have all that we have. He is the Source of all things, and in Him all
things hold together (Colossians 1). Jeremiah wrote,
This is what the LORD says: "Let not the wise boast of their wisdom
or the strong boast of their strength
or the rich boast of their riches,
24 but let the one who boasts boast about this:
that they have the understanding to know me,
that I am the LORD, who exercises kindness,
justice and righteousness on earth,
for in these I delight," declares the LORD. (Jeremiah 9:23-24)
Humility is the opposite of bragging, but just, doesn't speak to humility, usually. It's conjures a
limiting your view of yourself, and of what is possible. Defined as barely, or simply, no more
than. You are not a barely, a simply, a no more than. You are more than just... You are a
daughter of the Most High God. You are not just anything.
Our second seeming innocuous expression is two words: "If Only." If only brings to mind some
idealized reality, or comparison to what I have now to what I wish I had. It is the dreamer's
expectation that someone or something else is required before we can step into our destiny. If
Only says, "If only I had more discipline, I might be able to serve. If only I weren't so heavy, I
would feel like doing more. If only my husband were nicer, I wouldn't be having this affair. If
only absolves us of responsibility and places the blame squarely on someone or something
else-ultimately God! Remember Adam... "If only You hadn't given me the woman..."
Remember Mary and Martha and Lazarus. Lazarus was sick, and Jesus delayed attending him
until, by the time Jesus arrived, Lazarus had been dead for four days. "If only You had been
here," Mary and Martha both said to Jesus. Jesus's timing was perfect, though, "Did I not tell
you that if you believe, you will see the glory of God?" (John 11)
We can "if only" and reinforce a lack of faith... If only I made more money, if only I has so-
and-so's gift of XYZ... If only is a dead end thought pattern that need to be immediately
surrendered to God's sovereignty and His plan.
Just and If Only. The next two words in our vocabulary today. Are "I bet."
I bet assume we know or understand the thoughts, motivations, and actions of others. It's the
story we tell ourselves, especially when we feel vulnerable or intimidated. "I bet those girls are
talking about me. I bet he is attracted to that woman." "I bet they don't like me." "I bet they
deliberately excluded me because I'm (fill in the blank-poor, ugly, dumb, etc.)."
I saw a meme online that paints the perfect picture of how "I bet..." works. A woman is
glowering at her unsuspecting husband, and the thought bubble above her head says, "I bet he is
thinking of that pretty girl who served us at the restaurant!" He, oblivious, is thinking about his
new fishing lure!
I heard a Bible teacher refer to these thought patterns as "vain imaginations," a phrase from 2
Corinthians 10 where Paul talks about taking every thought captive. I can "I bet" myself into a
rage if I allow my emotions and assumptions to take the place of reason and love which gives
the benefit of the doubt. I bet we need to take those thoughts captive!
So, just, if only, I bet... and the last vocabulary word grouping is "might as well." This is one of
my kryptonite phrases! It is in lock-step with my all-or-nothing propensities which do not serve
me well. It is a perfectionist's mantra, and it is self-sabotage. Here's how is works...
How many times have I taken steps to eat healthier, only to slip and then think, "I had french
fries at lunch, might as well eat lots of dessert tonight." Or "I didn't exercise today, might as
well start fresh on Monday, or 1st of next month." "I've watched the first five episodes, might as
well finish the season." Yikes! Might as well is the expectation that we must be perfect, and
when we aren't it's the excuse to fail miserably, wholly. Might as well is compound interested
on a bad decision. Wouldn't we be more useful for the Kingdom is we accepted God's grace
and stayed the course?
Bad juju, these eight words. Just, if only, I bet, might as well. Be careful how you use them in a
sentence, particularly when you're talking to yourself! Grow your vocabulary to include words
that edify you and please your Father in Heaven.
Listen to God's Word about our words:
May these words of my mouth and this meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight, LORD,
my Rock and my Redeemer. Psalm 19:14
The mouths of the righteous utter wisdom, and their tongues speak what is just. Psalm 37:30 (a
good use of the word just!)
From the fruit of their lips people are filled with good things, and the work of their hands brings
them reward. Proverbs 12:14
Gracious words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones. Proverbs 16:24
Words from the mouth of the wise are gracious, but fools are consumed by their own lips.
Ecclesiastes 10:12
And from Ephesians 4:29: Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only
what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who
listen.
YOU are listening to your words. Speak what is helpful for building YOU up as often as you
speak to build others up.
Father,
Thank you for the power of words which originated with You. You are the original Speaker, the
One Whose words brought creation into existence, by Your word, everything that is came to be.
Thank you, too, for the Word made flesh in the Person of Jesus.
Lord, I pray that we are mindful of our words. Such little words, "little foxes that eat the vine"
so said wise Solomon in his Song of Songs. Lord, may our speech always be graceful, seasoned
with salt...not belittling or demeaning or calling us less than, but with the clear understanding
that we are beloved, chosen, royal, as You have told us in Your Word.
Thank you, Lord, for Your Truth coupled with Grace. Thank you for Your Word.
In Jesus's name,
Amen
