The Day After
In case you "tuned in" -or whatever the kids are calling it these days! -last week, there was no Talk & Pray podcast episode. Christmas festivities including dinner with extended family, church activities, and general busy-ness kept me from getting anything written and recorded. If you missed me last week, take a minute and subscribe or follow so you'll know for sure when episode have dropped, and if you really missed me, take a minute and leave a rating and review. OK! My daughter told me if I want more reviews to ask for them at the beginning. So there you go. I'm embarrassed and excited at the same time! Your reviews help make the podcast visible to others. I'd love to see it continue to grow as you have so kindly shared it and continue to listen.
And yes, in case you've listened before, I do actually write what I share from week to week. I cannot be trusted to keep my thoughts together for 15 minutes without a little preparation! Forget rabbit trails... I be like a moose knocking around in the wilderness, branches flying off trees, and general mayhem in the forest.
Just picture those big ol' ...just a sec...I gotta google this...Ahhhh....
Moose antlers are usually paired and shaped like the palm of a hand with outstretched fingers, called palmate, meaning shaped like a hand. They grow from the skull and are used for intimidation and fighting. They start to grow in the spring, peak in the fall, and fall off in the winter. So yeah!! Trust me, you want me writing stuff down, not knocking around in my head 'til things start falling off on the man.
And of course, the words "falling off" generated a movie reference from my long-distant past! In my head is Eddie Murphy as Alex Foley saying, "I think Victor should go check himself out with his physician to make sure everything is fine before things start falling off on the man." What is it with me and movie lines and song lyrics. It's absolutely true that things we experience in our youth are much more likely to be blurted out as we get older. That's from Beverly Hills Cop-the first one, in 1984, oh! My! Word! 40 years ago!? Now I'm really embarrassed. But the Axel Foley theme song still makes me smile! I'll link it in the show notes for fun.
Are we having fun yet? In a family gathering this past week, I heard a relative say that the days following Christmas Day are kind of a let-down. The days following the gifts and family gatherings are, in this person's world view, a time of disappointment - somebody's gotta exchange the sweater that doesn't fit, or return the extra crockpot tha momma got, or throw out un-eaten leftovers, or spend precious time-off running here or running there. It's a trade-off... and this particular relative felt he got the short end of the stick!
I ventured out the day after Christmas myself, testing his theory...and found that the after-sales and exchanges lines weren't as long as I remember. It seems that on-line shopping and gift exchange apps have changed the way we do gift-giving! My bunch opted into an app called Elfster, -E L F S T E R -recommended by my tech-savvy daughter and son-in-law, who keep their Christmas lists all year long, adding to the app as they find things they want, but don't want to buy for themselves. It works for birthdays and anniversaries, too. We all got on board, and I was able to get my son-in-law shoes that are the color he wanted and the right size, and the professional quality headphones my son wanted for his video editing. Without Elfster, I mighta bought the cheap pair, and he'd have had to return them. Ah! Technology!
My parents often told stories of their Christmases during the Great Depression when an apple and an orange along with a peppermint stick made for an amazing Christmas. We listened to these stories with the same skepticism as the "I walked three miles in the snow up hill to get coal for the school room" stories. As times got better, we were told, socks and underwear were the staples. As a little girl, I got socks and underwear, but school gift exchanges meant peer pressure of providing a suitable toy for someone else, so I got an additional gift that usually wouldn't have been in the budget. It always felt like the gift I got was worse than the one I gave. Short end of the stick again!
If feels just a little cynical, though, doesn't it? This ennui about the holidays. Time-off is too short, even for those who take the whole week between Christmas and New Year's, and the dread for the coming workweek sets in and puts a damper on the few days remaining. January 2nd looms, and it ain't pretty!
Add to that the challenge of New Year's goals and resolutions-many of which we've already resolved in our minds we won't keep! Talk about irony! -and we're beginning a new year with the tired attitudes and expectations we thought we left behind just day before yesterday!
I've been thinking about how I could start this year with a different mindset, a different paradigm. I worked with a great bunch of gals through the last two weeks of the year on a different way to think about Goals. What if... What if we ditched the SMART goals paradigm for something a little grittier.
You know SMART, right? Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Reasonable or Relevant, and Time-Bound. I can't tell you how many SMART goals I've set and felt really dumb when I didn't achieve them or when I lost interest in them. Where's the inspiration? The motivation? The drive that doesn't feel like too much ambition, but also doesn't feel lazy. The dream of impact without chasing dollar signs. The need to make money without being schmoozy or salesy or using "tactics" - which always sounds like code for manipulation to me. I read somewhere that the lionshare of marketing these days is fear-based. I'm so tired of FEAR! There must be a better way!
For me, the difference, the better way, is boiled down to two truths: God is my Source and God Speaks.
My "pitch" for Talk & Pray for Life & Business is "If you wanna change your life-your work, your habits, your relationships-start with WHO."
The Source... what is the source of everything? Where does it all begin? It isn't a what; it's a who. Who is the author and finisher, the alpha and omega, the beginning and the end? God is the source of everything. He is the Source of my identity, my gifts and talents, all the resources in the world. He is creator and sustainer, provider of all things. "In him we live and move and have our being," scripture tells us in Acts 17:28. "For in him all things were created: things in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or powers or rulers or authorities; all things have been created through him and for him. He is before all things, and in him all things hold together." Colossians 1:16-17
If I understand He is my Source, chasing success takes on a whole new meaning. I don't have to chase anymore; success is held in the hands of my creator and sustainer, and He gives liberally to those who love Him. I cannot fail. He is my Source.
And He SPEAKS! Why do we function in life as if the Voice of God was a thing for Bible times and isn't reality for us? If He is the Source of my goals, ambitions, abilities, and He SPEAKS - He tells me how to use them, what to use them for, how to stretch into God-sized opportunities... isn't that a more exciting way to launch? To dream? To live?
To think I can empty myself of nonsense-comparison, what Suzie down the street is doing, what I think I should be doing, what people have said is impossible to do-and receive what God wants to tell me... it's bold and empowering. Not in a "flex my muscles, I'm a boss-babe" kind of way, but a "Wow! God is up to something, and I'm a part of it because He created me for such a time as this!" That's how His voice transforms.
It's heady stuff. And sounds like so much voodoowoowoo. (That's a new word, you heard it here first.) But Jesus was clear. "My sheep listen to my voice; I know them, and they follow me." John 10:27. The Psalmist wrote, "In the morning, Lord, you hear my voice; in the morning I lay my requests before you and wait expectantly."
I've been sitting in my rocker in the morning and listening, waiting expectantly to hear Him speak. Father, I've got an event coming up. What do You want me to share there? And He whispers into my imagination. I hear words that lead me to Scripture, and I'm secure that these are His words, and they are the words for that hour.
I pray, "Lord, where are you taking me this New Year?" and He reveals a step or speaks a word that I can explore further. Last week, the word was "Moderator." I looked it up and found instructions about moderating well. And after leading a group online, my business coach affirmed, "You moderated that meeting so well. You were able to engage everyone. It was wonderful!" The Source of my preparation spoke the word and supplied the tools I didn't even yet know I needed.
My new paradigm for Goals is the result of these two truths: God is my Source and He Speaks. I don't do SMART goals; I do GRITTE goals:
G - God-Sourced and God Sized - He is the one Who initiates!
R - Relational - I am a part of a Kingdom; we do things together
I - Identity Aligned - I am uniquely created by God for such a time as this! He tells me who I am!
T - Transformational - An encounter with God will change me and others
T - Time Bound - I have His unlimited resources to use in the time He's given me
E - Evident - He will confirm what He speaks in ways that are evident to me and to others, resulting in His glory. Let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven. Matthew 5:16.
As I read through the GRITTE model, I get not just gritty, but giddy. No cynicism. Just this HOPE. "Hope that is seen is no hope at all," Romans 8:24 says, and Paul goes on to say that we don't even know what to pray, but the Spirit intercedes for us... so I don't have to have all the answers. I don't even have to know all the questions. God is my Source. And He Speaks.
So no New Year's ennui for me. I'm skipping those feelings of weariness and dissatisfaction. The Day After a holiday, the day after unmet expectations, the day after the great Moose Misstep, things fallin' off of the man, and all the world going to hell in a handbasket, the day after missing my goal or being less than perfect, is the Day that I lay my request before him and wait patiently. I don't have to be SMART, or perfect, or have to worry about the short end of the stick. He's got this. He's got me. I'll take GRITTE over SMART any day.
Father,
I confess, this feels so experimental! It's not new, as my husband reminded me, but it feels like a breath of fresh air to me. The wind of Your Spirit revealing truth and hope. I'm trusting You to be Who You say You are! I'm trusting You to speak. Like the Psalmist, I ask You to show me anything that would keep me from hearing your voice. Search me and know my heart; try me and know my thoughts. I don't want to take another step without Your say-so.
I believe You are my Source, and like the man whose child Jesus healed, I pray, "I do believe, help my unbelief!" Help me trust You enough to obey when I hear Your voice. To leave results up to You, to define Success the way You do, to walk in step with You all the way home. Thank you for the excitement of a life with You! Thank you for loving me. Thank you for a new day!
In Jesus' name.
I'll put links for a pdf and pic of the GRITTE acronym in case you wanna give that a go in your goal setting! For a free Goals masterclass going deeper with these ideas, get on the waiting list for the next session coming tentatively in March, maybe sooner if time permits, at talkandpray.us/mastermind.
The His Power at Work Mastermind that covers additional topics in 6 sessions over the next 90 days is open for enrollment. If you enroll in the Mastermind, the Goals masterclass videos and materials will be sent to you now! Check it all out at talkandpray.us/mastermind.
